HERE BEGINNETH THE SIX AND THIRTIETH CHAPTER
Of the meditations of them that continually travail in the
work of this book.
BUT it is not so with them that continually work in the work of this book. For
their meditations be but as they were sudden conceits and blind feelings of
their own wretchedness, or of the goodness of God; without any means of reading
or hearing coming before, and without any special beholding of any thing under
God. These sudden conceits and these blind feelings be sooner learned of God
than of man. I care not though thou haddest nowadays none other meditations of
thine own wretchedness, nor of the goodness of God (I mean if thou feel thee
thus stirred by grace and by counsel), but such as thou mayest have
in this word SIN, and in this word GOD: or in such other, which as thee list.
Not breaking nor expounding these words with curiosity of wit, in beholding
after the qualities of these words, as thou wouldest by that beholding increase
thy devotion. I trow it should never be so in this case and in this work. But
hold them all whole these words; and mean by sin, a lump, thou wottest
never what, none other thing but thyself. Me think that in this blind beholding
of sin, thus congealed in a lump, none other thing than thyself, it should be
no need to bind a madder thing, than thou shouldest be in this time. And yet
peradventure, whoso looked upon thee should think thee full soberly disposed in
thy body, without any changing of countenance; but sitting or going or lying,
or leaning or standing or kneeling, whether thou wert, in a full sober
restfulness.